Characters

The Simple Secret to Figuring Out How Much Development Your Minor Characters Need

~ Kaitlin Hillerich ~ 1 Comment

Who are the main and minor characters in your novel? Can you tell the difference? Where do you draw the line between the two? How do you decide how fleshed out each one needs to be? Use this simple trick and never scratch your head over how much to develop minor characters again!

At the moment, I have seven minor characters who have recurring roles in my current novel-in-progress.

Yes, you read that right—seven.

Yes, I’m a little crazy.

And yes, it took an endless supply of tea for me to get through this story without losing my mind. (Actually, that last part is still debatable, but I digress…)

It’s a large cast, the largest I’ve ever taken on, and it was overwhelming trying to develop and keep track of so many characters. One of the most confusing parts of having a cast that large, I quickly realized, was trying to figure out how much to develop each character.

Who was a minor character? Who was a main character? Where did I draw the line between the two? How did I decide how fleshed out each one needed to be? Did they all need character arcs? Did I have to tell the backstory of each one?

As if my head wasn’t spinning enough already.

Three drafts later I got it figured out eventually, but I want to save you that time and trouble and hopefully some extra work. Once I figured out the determining factor I could use to easily decide how much I need to develop each of my characters, I was doing a major face palm.

It’s pretty simple and obvious, and I’m going to share it with you in a bit. But before we get there, we need to go over how to tell your main and minor characters apart.

Main vs. Minor Character—What’s the Difference?

Main characters are well-developed, have an important role in the story, drive the plot, and spend a lot of time on the page.

On the other hand, minor characters are flat, don’t play major roles in the story, add to the plot but don’t shape it, and have less page time.

Main characters are the are the meat of the story; minor characters are the spices.

How Much Should You Develop Minor Characters?

By definition, minor characters don’t need to be well-developed. Yet I often hear writers say they’re worried their minor characters are too flat and they want to know how they can give them more dimension.

This thinking comes from the misconception that flat characters always = bad, and round (well-developed) characters always = good. Therefore, if you make all the characters in your novel round, it will be even better!

Hold your horses there.

This is one of the biggest MISUNDERSTANDINGS of minor characters. Your minor characters don’t need to be round. You’re creating unnecessary work and headaches for yourself trying to fix a problem that isn’t actually a problem.

You need BOTH round and flat characters in your novel. Why? Every character has a role to play in the story, just like actors in a play. Some roles are big (aka leading roles). Some roles are small with only a few lines. And some roles may not even have a speaking part at all!

The thing is, when you start to add more dimension and development to a minor character, you’re spending too much time on a character who doesn’t have a huge role in the story. The more time you spend on something in a novel, the more important your reader will assume it is.

So if you spend all this time fleshing out a character who doesn’t have an important role in your story, you will confuse your reader by misleading them to think the character was more important than they actually turned out to be.

The other problem is that every character simply can’t be round. There’s not enough page space to give every character that sort of development, not to mention it would create a mess. It would be like watching a play where every actor with a minor role was trying to hog the stage by adding extra lines and scenes for their character.

A good rule of thumb is that the bigger role a character has and the more important she is to the story, the more development she needs. The smaller the role, the less development.

We’ll explore this more in-depth in an example here in a moment.

Types of Characters

Some characters have larger roles than others, which creates a spectrum of varying degrees of importance and development. These can blur and blend together, but here are the main types you will often see:

Extras—minor characters who serve as the background or scenery of the story and help make the setting feel full and alive. They may have a brief role for one scene, but once they’ve fulfilled their purpose they disappear. Sometimes, they may not have a speaking role at all. (Ex. a waiter, taxi driver, bartender, etc.)

Recurring Characters—minor characters who may become momentarily involved in the action and have small roles to play. Unlike Extras, they appear multiple times throughout the story and we learn a little more about them. (Ex. the hero’s mother, teacher, coworker, etc.)

Main Supporting Characters—main characters who help the hero along their journey towards achieving their goal. They appear constantly throughout the story, and of all the minor characters they get the most page time and development. (Ex. the hero’s best friend, sidekick, love interest, etc.)

Hero—the main character at the top of the hierarchy, the most important and the one driving the plot. Without this character there would be no story.

Case Study: Harry Potter and the Sorcerer’s Stone

Let’s look at an example of these types more in-depth using Harry Potter and the Sorcerer’s Stone.

Do you remember Griphook, the goblin who takes Harry and Hagrid down into the vaults below Gringotts bank? It’s his only scene in the book, and we don’t learn anything about him other than he works at Gringotts. His role in the story is to serve a function in the scene—to take Harry and Hagrid down to the mysterious vault 713 and retrieve what we later learn is the sorcerer’s stone.

We don’t care that we don’t learn more about Griphook, and we don’t need to—he’s not important to the story. J.K. Rowling knows this, so she doesn’t spend much time on him. He’s a flat character but it doesn’t matter because he serves his purpose.

Griphook is an example of the “Extra” minor character—he’s part of the scenery and helps make the story world feel full and realistic, along with the other goblins in Gringotts who were mentioned but weren’t named or given any dialogue. Once his role is finished, we move on and leave him behind.

In comparison, Hagrid is a Recurring minor character. He doesn’t drive the story, but he becomes a friend and guide to Harry and becomes involved in the action from time to time. For example, “rescuing” Harry from the Dursleys and whisking him away to Hogwarts.

He has recurring appearances unlike Griphook and because of his relationship to Harry and his occasional participation is the action, we see more of him and get to know him a little better.

We learn he has a wand hidden in an umbrella and he’s not supposed to do magic, he’s a gamekeeper at Hogwarts and lives in a hut on the grounds, he has a dog named Fang, and he has an affinity for ferocious magical creatures.

Next, we have Ron and Hermione, who are Main Supporting characters. Unlike Griphook and Hagrid, they get even more page time and development because they play a more important role in the story—helping the hero achieve his goal.

Companions, sidekicks, and sometimes even love interests who are constantly by the hero’s side are all supporting characters. Supporting characters need to be more rounded because we spend more time with them and they’re more important.

Finally, at the top of this character hierarchy we have Harry, who is of course the hero of the story. He is the character we spend the most time with, learn the most about, and who is the most developed.

Increased Importance = Increased Development

Hopefully you can see from this example how the development increases with each character as their importance to the story increases:

Griphook>Hagrid>Ron & Hermione>Harry

Extras and Recurring minor character like Hagrid and Griphook can be flat without any problem—they’re the spice that adds color and interesting flavor to the story. On the other hand, Supporting main characters like Ron and Hermione who are of greater importance will need to be more developed and be more round. Finally, your hero like Harry will need to be fully fleshed out.

The one caveat to all of this is that sometimes over a series of books a minor character can become more rounded and may even increase in importance and expand their role.

For example, towards the end of the Harry Potter series when we learn more about Snape’s past it gives the character more depth. But at the beginning of the series he just starts out as Harry’s nasty potions teacher. However, a standalone novel won’t have to page space for this sort of development of minor characters.

So to sum things up, the secret to figuring out how much development your character needs lies in their importance to the story. When you realize the size and scope of the role your character will play in the overall plot, you will be able to decide how much page time and development you should give them.

Let’s Review

  • Main characters are the are the meat of the story; minor characters are the spices.
  • Flat characters aren’t necessarily bad. You need both flat and round characters in your novel.
  • The bigger role a character has and the more important she is to the story, the more development she needs. The smaller the role, the less development.
  • Extras, recurring characters, main supporting characters, and the hero all have varying degrees of importance.
  • Supporting characters like companions and sidekicks need to be more developed than minor characters.
  • The hero should be the most rounded and fleshed out character in the story since she’s the one the story is about and who we will spend the most time with.
  • The secret to figuring out how much development your character needs lies in their importance to the story.

The Ultimate Guide to Mastering Character Descriptions

~ Kaitlin Hillerich ~ 2 Comments

Writing vivid character descriptions is a struggle many writers face. If you're tired of your descriptions falling flat this guide will help you become a pro once and for all! Plus, there are free worksheets and cheat sheets to help you write character descriptions the easy way!The first time I tried to describe my characters, it was a total disaster.

I couldn’t understand why because I’m a very descriptive writer. Describing landscapes? I got that. Fantasy creatures no one’s ever seen before? You betcha. Medieval cities? I’m a pro.

But when it came to people, suddenly I couldn’t find any words that worked. No matter what words I used, the descriptions fell flat instead of bringing my characters vividly to life.

I didn’t realize then that I was going about my character descriptions all wrong—I thought I just sucked at describing people. Years later, though, I learned that anyone can write a stellar character description, even if descriptive writing isn’t their strong suit!

Any of this sounding familiar? Describing characters is something a lot of writers struggle with, myself included. Though I’ve come a long way since my first feeble (and horrible) attempts, it’s still something I have to work harder at than other types of description.

I don’t know if I’ll ever understand why people seem to be so tricky to describe, but I don’t want you to face the same frustrations and struggles that I did. You’re not alone, and I’m here to help, friend!

I’ve written this MONSTER guide to answer all of the most frequently asked questions about describing characters I’ve gotten from writers like you. I’ve also created FREE worksheets and cheat sheets to make describing your characters a whole lot easier, so be sure to grab those below! (No email sign-up required!)

Now, without further ado, let’s get into the why, when, who, what, and how of character description!

What Is the Purpose of Character Description?

I feel like the purpose of character description often gets somewhat muddled in writers’ minds. If I asked you why you want to describe your character in your story, what would your answer be? You would probably say you want to give the reader a clear mental picture of what your character looks like.

That’s a valid reason, but there’s another that is even more important but sometimes gets overlooked.

The main way I use character description in my stories is as a form of characterization. Through descriptive details, I try to reveal the character’s personality so that not only does the reader come away with a mental picture of what the character looks like, but they also get a feel for who the character is.

Before I viewed description as an opportunity to characterize, I was hung up on the description itself. I thought character descriptions had to be beautiful and lush with detail. I felt a lot of pressure to find the right words so my readers would picture my character exactly as I did. I thought because I couldn’t write gorgeous character descriptions, I sucked at them.

But you know what I finally realized? Describing a character is more about characterization than flowery language. Once I realized this, a lot of the pressure I felt toward describing my characters lifted.

When Should I Describe My Character?

Whenever you introduce a new character, you should try to describe her as soon as possible. Why? Because the moment a character steps onto the page, the reader’s imagination will immediately begin to conjure an image.

For example, let’s say I encounter a character named Louise in a story. I immediately begin to picture a brunette woman in a retro dress, bright red lipstick, and fashionable glasses. Don’t ask me why, that’s just the image that springs to mind.

Now, this image may or may not match up to the author’s own personal idea of what she intends Louise to look like. If the author doesn’t give me any details to provide me with a different mental picture ASAP, I’m going to stick with my own version.

If you wait too long to describe your character, the reader will likely reject your description in favor of their own mental image. Let’s say you’re reading a story and you’ve been imagining the heroine as a petite girl with a blonde pixie cut, but halfway through the book you find out she’s actually 6 foot tall with waist-length black hair.

That discovery will be jarring to the reader. Since the read is already familiar with the mental image she had created for the character, she will likely ignore this description and keep imagining her the way she likes. I have done this several times myself as a reader!

To avoid this situation, try to describe a new character as soon as she’s introduced to provide the reader with the mental image you want them to have.

Now, there is one exception to this. If a character is introduced in the middle of an action scene, you do NOT want to bring the action to a screeching halt to describe them. Wait until things have calmed down, and then you can describe them. It’s okay to wait a few pages, I promise.

Which Characters Should I Describe?

You don’t have to give a detailed description of every character in your novel. You should give most of the attention to your main characters, and then add a little detail to your secondary characters.

You don’t need to describe the desk clerk at the hotel, the taxi driver, or the bartender. Some characters are just background extras that don’t have any importance in the story so you don’t want to spend any more time on them than necessary.

If you start describing these types of characters you call attention to them, and you could confuse the reader into thinking they might be important later when really they have no significance other than filler to make your story world feel fleshed out. So let the reader’s imagination fill in the blanks on this one, or limit yourself to a brief, simple description like “the burly bartender.”

I also want to point out that there tends to be a difference between how main characters and secondary characters are described. Secondary characters are often more colorful, exaggerated, and quirky. Because they have a small role, they have to burn bright to be memorable. So feel free to get crazy with your secondary characters and have some fun!

How Much Should I Describe?

The amount of character description really depends on the writer and their writing style. Some writers are really good at writing beautiful character descriptions, so they might make their descriptions longer. Other writers have a very to-the-point and less descriptive writing style, so their character descriptions may be very sparse.

I would say a paragraph of character description should be more than enough (with 3-5 sentences being one paragraph). Any more than that might start leaning toward too much, but it’s always a judgment call. A reader can only remember so many details and you don’t want to overwhelm them. Often, less is more.

Funnily enough, I don’t think there’s any danger in describing too little. In fact, some writers intentionally choose not to describe their characters at all. Now, you’re probably thinking, why in the world would any writer want to do this? Good question.

One argument for not describing your characters is to allow the reader full control over how they want to imagine them.

Remember how earlier we talked about readers immediately conjuring mental images for characters? Readers’ imaginations are powerful and very good at filling in the blanks. Some readers prefer to imagine things their own way and not be told how to image them by the author.

Another argument for this tactic is that when a character is left undescribed, the reader will often project their own physical features onto the character.

So if they’re blonde, they’ll likely image the character as blonde. If they’re Asian, they’ll likely imagine the character as Asian. This is why some authors prefer not to describe their heroes—so that the reader can imagine the hero looks like herself, no matter her physical features or race.

It’s a beautiful thought that one character could look so many different ways to so many different readers!

So really, it comes down to personal choice. When you have a specific image in your head of what your character looks like, it can be hard to relinquish control and let the reader imagine them however they want. However, if you want the reader to picture the character a certain way, then by all means provide them with that description!

But keep in mind that no matter how meticulously detailed your description is, your readers won’t recreate your mental image with 100% accuracy (and that’s okay!).

Words aren’t photographs, and that can sometimes be challenging and frustrating. This is why the best advice I can give you is to focus on characterizing with description instead of focusing on writing the most accurate description possible.

What Should I Describe?

Many writers have trouble moving beyond hair and eye color in their descriptions, and I get it. Those two things are the easiest and most obvious to describe. But what else can you say about a character’s physical appearance?

To create an effective character description, it’s all about 1) choosing the right details to convey personality, and 2) choosing the most interesting details. Remember, you don’t need to describe everything. You just need to describe the best things.

For example, depending on which details you choose to focus on, you could convey a wild character (spiked lime-green Mohawk, mermaid tattoo, wearing a live yellow boa constrictor as a scarf), a sloppy character (uncombed hair, wrinkled shirt, crumbs in beard), or a timid character (hunched posture, eyes cast downward, plain/muted clothing).

Notice how I only mentioned a few details but already you probably have a pretty good visual picture of these characters and a feel for who they are. It doesn’t take much! And these types of details tell the reader far more about the character than “he had jet black hair and blue eyes.” Ask yourself what this character is like, and how you can express this visually.

Here are some ideas of what you can describe to get you started:

  • Facial features (face shape, eyes, nose, lips, jaw, chin, brows, ears, cheekbones, facial hair)
  • Hair color, texture, and style
  • Build/body type and height
  • Skin tone
  • Skin texture (weathered, wrinkled, smooth, hairy, etc.)
  • Skin afflictions (acne, eczema, oily, moles, warts, boils, etc.)
  • Distinguishing features (scars, freckles, birthmarks, tattoos, piercings, etc.)
  • Teeth
  • Makeup
  • Clothing, accessories, and personal items
  • Voice/accent
  • Posture
  • Scent
  • Gestures, body language, mannerisms

How Do I Describe My Characters? (Tricks for Better Descriptions)

1. Avoid Creating a Grocery List of Physical Traits

Don’t merely list out your character’s physical traits like you’re checking items you need off a list. It will end up sounding like this:

“He was a young man with brown eyes and black hair. He was tall and wore jeans with a red t-shirt.”

Blah! The problem with this sort of description is that it’s completely forgettable and boring. It doesn’t create a vivid image that brings the character to life. It doesn’t reveal anything unique or interesting about him. This description is far too basic; we need to go deeper to create a character that pops off the page. Read on to find out how!

2. Choose Interesting Details

As I already mentioned earlier, you want to choose interesting details about your character that show his personality. Don’t go overboard here—two or three should be plenty. One carefully chosen detail can say far more about your character’s personality than five or ten general details.

3. Use Similes and Metaphors

Using similes and metaphors help to give a more vivid picture and a stronger emotional impression about a character.

For example, instead of “He was tall” a better description would be: “His towering bulk loomed in front of her like a mountain, immovable and impassable.”

The first is just a stated fact. However, the second gives us the feeling that this character is formidable and might pose a problem or obstacle, and the imagery is much stronger.

4. Consider Perception

The description of a character can change depending on who is describing him. For example, a man’s wife will describe him far differently than his enemy.

Consider how your viewpoint character perceives the character being described, and communicate their impression through word choice and the details they focus on.

5. Get Specific

The more specific you can get with your details, the more vivid and interesting your description will be and the more it will reveal about the character.

For example, instead of “He had blue eyes” try, “His eyes were the same turbulent, depthless blue as the sea he had sailed upon since he was a boy.”

The first tells us nothing, while the second suggests the character is dealing with some sort of internal turmoil and also reveals he’s a sailor.

6. Add Movement

People aren’t still-life portraits. When you put your characters into action, it helps bring the description to life.

What is your character doing? Clutching nervously at her purse on a busy street? Tapping her foot as she waits in line for coffee? Hunching her shoulders and ducking her head as she walks through the school halls? Hot wiring a car? Dancing in the middle of the supermarket?

Actions help to reveal the character’s emotions, hint at what’s going on beneath the surface, and characterize her further.  Try to incorporate body language, posture, mannerisms, and other actions into your descriptions.

Let’s Review

Now that you know the why, when, who, what, and how of describing your characters, it’s time to practice writing some descriptions of your own. It’s okay if your descriptions don’t turn out perfect at first—I promise the more you practice, the better you will become!

To help make things easier, I’ve created a collection of FREE worksheets for you to use. You’ll find cheat sheets that list physical details for easy reference and ideas, in-depth description worksheets to help you uncover the most interesting details about your character, and my 5 step no-fail character description template.

Click below to download + print these resources and get started! (No email required! It’s 100% free. Seriously.)

Key Takeaways:

  • Describing a character is more about characterization than flowery language.
  • When you introduce a new character, describe her as soon as possible before the reader creates and grows accustomed to their own image.
  • You don’t have to give a detailed description of every character in your novel, just the important ones.
  • Secondary characters often have more colorful, quirky descriptions to make them more memorable due to their smaller roles in the story.
  • How much you describe is up to you. Some writers choose not to describe their characters at all so the readers can create their own images.
  • You don’t need to describe everything about your character, you just need to describe the best things.
  • Choose details the most interesting details that convey your character’s personality.
  • Ask yourself “What is this character like?” and then express this visually

Additional Resources:

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Writing 101: Choosing the Best Point of View for Your Story

~ Kaitlin Hillerich ~ 5 Comments

Are you confused about which point of view would be the best fit for your story? Learn about the techniques involved in each one and which is the best fit for you!Years ago, I remember watching a film called Vantage Point. The plot revolved around an assassination attempt on the U.S. President, and in order to catch the would-be assassin government agents had to piece together clues from witnesses.

Each witness had a different point of view of the assassination attempt from their place in the crowd. Each one saw and experienced the moment differently. From a police officer to a news reporter to an ordinary bystander, each had a different story to tell of the same event.

And that, my friend, is point of view–the “lens” or perspective through which a story is told, and in whose voice. But just who is telling the story? In fiction, different points of view use varying techniques to give the reader a different experience. Let’s look at the options available to you as a writer.

First Person Point of View

You’ve probably come across this one before, as it’s one of the most popular points of view (POV) used in fiction, especially in Young Adult novels. In this point of view, the main character is the one telling the story. The story is written in the character’s voice using the pronouns I/me/my.

The advantage of this POV is that the reader is drawn right into the character’s head. We see the world through their eyes and hear their thoughts. It’s a very intimate perspective. As such, however, the reader is limited to what the main character knows or sees, which can be either an advantage or disadvantage depending on the story you’re trying to tell.

Examples: The Hunger Games by Suzanne Collins, The Fault in Our Stars by John Green, The Help by Kathryn Stockett, Memoirs of a Geisha by Arthur Golden, The Catcher in the Rye by J.D. Salinger, and The Great Gatsby by F. Scott Fitzgerald

Second Person Point of View

Second person point of view is when the author speaks directly to the reader using you/your. This places the reader directly into the story as though they are the main character and has a very engaging effect. Let’s look at an example from Leo Tolstoy’s short story trio, The Sevastopol Sketches:

Yes ! disenchantment certainly awaits you, if you are entering Sevastopol for the first time. In vain will you seek, on even a single countenance, for traces of anxiety, discomposure, or even of enthusiasm, readiness for death, decision, — there is nothing of the sort. You will see the tradespeople quietly engaged in the duties of their callings, so that, possibly, you may reproach yourself for superfluous raptures, you may entertain some doubt as to the justice of the ideas regarding the heroism of the defenders of Sevastopol which you have formed from stories, descriptions, and the sights and sounds on the northern side.

As you can see, second person almost turns the reader into a participant in the story.  It also makes the events more personal; it makes us feel as though we have a stake in the story and forces more internal reflection on our thoughts and feelings about what is happening.

This point of view is rarely used, and when it is, it’s usually found in short stories or parts of a novel. It’s extremely difficult to maintain second person throughout an entire novel and do it well. I would only recommend using second person in short stories or literary fiction, which experiments with the art of writing. For commercial fiction written for entertainment, it’s best to skip it.

Though it isn’t popular, authors can and have used second person successfully. For example, Italo Calvino’s If On A Winter’s Night A Traveller uses second person in alternating chapters, and William Faulkner uses it in sections of his novel Absalom, Absalom!. A few brave and talented authors have even written their entire novel in second person, such as Jay McInerney’s Bright Lights, Big City.

Find the Right Point of View for Your Story

Third Person Point of View

Another popular point of view which you’re probably familiar with is third person. This is the point of view used most frequently in fiction. In this point of view, the reader becomes an outsider looking in on the story as it’s told from the main character’s perspective using he/she/they.

Although the story is told from the character’s perspective, it’s told in the author’s voice (though there is one exception to this which we’ll get to in a moment!). There are three types of third person: Third Person Omniscient, Third Person Limited, and Deep Point of View.

Third Person Omniscient

“Omciscient” means “all knowing” and that’s exactly what this point of view is.

The story is narrated to the reader in the disembodied voice of an all-knowing, all-seeing god who knows what all of the characters are thinking and feeling at all times. The narrator might even slip into second person occasionally and address the reader (a huge no-no in modern fiction!) or state his own opinions. Omniscient point of view is completely unlimited, and pretty much anything goes.

Here’s a quick example:

“Did you find your keys?” Mary asked, irritated at John’s carelessness. He was always losing everything. Why can’t he be more organized? she thought. He’s always wasting my time. Her jaw clenched in anger.

John ran a hand through his hair. “No. I could have sworn I left them on the kitchen table.” He turned away from her angry face, his own frustration mounting. She thinks I’m an idiot, he thought. Why can’t I remember where they are? Desperation began to creep over him.

Do you see how in omniscient point of view we are in both character’s heads at once? This style of writing was most popular in 19th century literature, but since then reader’s tastes have changes and it’s now less favored in modern-day fiction.

Today, we call this switching back and forth between multiple character’s thoughts within the same scene “head hopping,” and it’s often frowned upon. All of the jumping around can  be disorienting to the reader and leave them confused about whose story this is supposed to be.

But what if you need the perspectives of multiple characters to tell your story? There is another technique for this which is more popular and common modern fiction, which we’ll get to in the last section.

Examples of third person omniscient novels: War and Peace by Leo Tolstoy, The Scarlet Letter by Nathaniel Hawthorne, and Pride and Prejudice by Jane Austen.

Third Person Limited

This is the style of third person that is more popular with modern readers. We remain in one character’s head throughout the story, only seeing things from their perspective. This means we only hear their thoughts, feel what they feel, and know what they know.

Let’s revisit our previous example of Mary and John, for a moment. This time, I’ll limit the point of view to Mary’s perspective only:

“Did you find your keys?” Mary asked, irritated at John’s carelessness. He was always losing everything. Why can’t he be more organized? she thought. He’s always wasting my time. Her jaw clenched in anger.

John ran a hand through his hair. “No. I could have sworn I left them on the kitchen table.” He turned away from her, his lips pressed in a flat line.

Mary sighed. He couldn’t even look her in the eye, he looked like a scolded, cowering dog. Maybe she shouldn’t look so angry. She drew in a deep breath and tried to soften her features. Lord, give me patience.

Do you see the difference? We don’t know what John is thinking or feeling. We experience everything from Mary’s POV and only know what’s going on inside her head. Unlike omniscient POV which is limitless, in this POV we are “limited” to Mary’s perspective.

Examples of limited third person: The Giver by Lois Lowry, Fahrenheit 451 by Ray Bradbury, and A Song of Ice and Fire series (Game of Thrones) by George R.R. Martin.

Deep Point of View

Deep point of view is a style of writing that is beginning to grow in popularity. It uses third person pronouns he/she/they, but instead of using the author’s voice the story is told in hero’s voice. This brings the reader deep into the hero’s head and allows them to experience the story through the hero, feeling what they feel.

Essentially, it’s like first person except with he/she instead of I. All “evidence” of the author’s hand (phrases like he said, she felt, he wondered, etc.) are also removed to erase the distance between the reader and hero.

Let’s look at this technique in action.

Example 1 (Third Person Limited):

Kali hurried though the village. She wondered if he was already waiting for her. She lifted her skirts and leapt over a puddle. She knew she should have left earlier, but her mother had kept on talking about the chickens.

Example 2 (Deep POV):

Kali hurried through the village. Was he already waiting for her? She lifted her skirts and leapt over a puddle. She should have left earlier, but her mother had kept on and on about the chickens. Chickens this, and eggs that. Be sure to this, don’t do it like that. Kali’s fidgety impatience had driven the details from her memory. Hopefully they weren’t too important.

Notice the difference between the two examples. The second brings you into Kali’s head by removing “interruptions” by the author like “she wondered” or “she knew.” The second example also uses more of Kali’s voice to reveal her thoughts, feelings, and perceptions–it’s almost as though she is the narrator, yet we stay in third person point of view.

This point of view can be challenging to write and is still emerging in fiction, but it’s quickly gaining popularity in the writing world because of the intimacy it creates between the reader and character.

Multiple Point of View

When you have a story that needs to be told from multiple perspectives, you have two options: you can either use third person omniscient and head hop, or you can use multiple point of view.

Multiple point of view can use third person limited, deep point of view, or first person. It stays in one character’s head at a time per scene or chapter. When the writer needs to switch to a different character’s perspective, they skip a line between scenes or begin a new chapter to signal to the reader that they are changing to a new character. In modern fiction, this technique is the preferred way of telling a story with multiple characters.

Examples: A Song of Ice and Fire series (Game of Thrones) by George R.R. Martin, The Night Circus by Erin Morgenstern, and The Lunar Chronicles by Marissa Meyer.

Which POV is Right for Your Story?

Are you confused about which point of view would be the best fit for your story? Learn about the techniques involved in each one and which is the best fit for you!So now that we’ve explored your options, which one should you choose?

If you’re uncertain, try asking yourself these questions:

  1. How many perspectives do I need to tell this story?
  2. Do I want to create distance or intimacy between the reader and the character?
  3. Do I want to tell the story in my own voice, or the character’s?

If you need multiple perspectives to tell your story you might use multiple POV or experiment with third person omniscient.

If you want to create intimacy between your reader and character, first person or deep point of view are the way to go. Or, you could create intimacy between the author and reader with second person.

Need a little more distance? Try third person limited or omniscient point of view.

If you want your character’s voice to really come through in your story, you’ll want to employ first person or deep point of view. Or, if you prefer to use your own voice, third person limited & omniscient and second person will all allow you to do so.

As you can see, it all depends upon the story you want to tell and how you want to tell it. I don’t think there’s a “right” or “wrong” point of view, but for a new writer I would recommend  maybe starting with third person limited or first person as those as the most common and easiest of the bunch to write.

Many times, the point of view a writer chooses depends on personal preference. Some writers find first person too challenging or invasive, while others love it. Personally, I’ve always preferred third person limited (I’m now moving toward deep POV), but I do occasionally use first person. Sometimes the characters “speak” to me in first person, and sometimes I hear their story in third person.

The beauty of point of view is that each method gives the reader a different experience. As the author, it’s up to you to decide how you want your readers to experience your story. Do you want to draw them into the hero’s head? Make them a participant? Show them different perspectives through multiple characters? The power rests in your hands.

What’s your favorite point of view to read and write? Let me know in the comments below!

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Is Your Character a Mary Sue?

~ Kaitlin Hillerich ~ 29 Comments

Is your character a Mary Sue? You might be writing one without even realizing it! Learn the warning signs and how to fix them to create a character with more depth and realism. It’s hard for writers to be hard on our characters, to tell them no or make them suffer or give them flaws. Like proud, doting mothers, we want them to be our perfect children who can do no wrong. We want them to be successful. We want to spoil them, and we want readers to love them. Heck, we might even want them to inherent some of our own qualities. But unfortunately, this type of attitude often leads to the creation of a Mary Sue.

What Does a Mary Sue Look Like?

A “Mary Sue” is either a female or male (sometimes called a “Gary Stu”) character who embodies the perfect hero/heroine. Often, she is an idealized version of the author herself. Mary Sues are usually beautiful, talented, have few or no flaws, and are loved by everyone.

The problem is, all this is bestowed upon them without them having to “earn” it. They are effortlessly beautiful; they have special abilities or prodigy-like skills they don’t have to work to develop; other characters want to be their friends or lovers or lavish them with admiration without them doing anything to deserve it. Not only is this unrealistic, but it serves to irritate the reader and often turn her against the Mary Sue.

As for examples of Mary Sues, it’s been argued that characters like Harry Potter, Luke Skywalker, Rey, Superman, Eragon, Bella Swan, and Edward Cullen fall into this character type.

I’m not going to debate in this article whether they do or don’t, but I would like to point out that some of the characters on this list are loved by many, while others are despised. So a Mary Sue character doesn’t automatically spell doom, but I do think it’s wise to avoid creating one if possible.

Mary Sue Signs and Solutions

Okay, I’m going to share a secret with you: the heroine of my first novel was a Mary Sue. It wasn’t intentional, but as a new, 14-year-old writer I did end up putting a lot of myself into the character. She was also beautiful, talented, and fit into nearly every one of the categories below. When I realized the mistake I had made I gave her a major over-haul in later drafts.

Sometimes–especially if you’re new to writing stories–you might create a Mary Sue without realizing it. But with a little bit of work you can re-shape your character into one with much more depth and realism.

Below are 6 warning signs of a Mary Sue and how to fix them. Note that if your character fits one or two of these categories, that doesn’t mean they’re a Mary Sue. The real trouble comes when your character fits a bunch or all of these categories. So don’t panic if your character has a special talent or is a chosen one!

1. Beautiful, Yet Plain

A Mary Sue usually sees herself as plain or average, but really she’s beautiful or even gorgeous. Guys don’t fail to take notice, and her friends and family reassure her of her beauty even as she laments about how plain she is. Often, she’ll have a special hair or eye color to make her more unique, or exotic features.

Solution: Try to avoid words/phrases that describe characters as beautiful/handsome  unless it’s important to their character or the story. Also, if it’s not important don’t give your heroine gold or violet eyes in an attempt to make her more unique. Not only do these colors not exist in real life, but I feel like it screams trying to hard to make the hero “special.”

Now, when you’re describing a love interest through the eyes of the character who loves them, it’s fine to be more biased about looks because of course when you love someone you’re going to be attracted to them! But don’t go crazy with it. Try to avoid creating a cast of supermodels.

2. Talented

A Mary Sue is extremely talented, often in more than one area. She doesn’t have to work at her skill, it just comes to her naturally.

Solution: This doesn’t mean that you can’t give your hero a talent. It’s good for heroes to have a strength, and in real life people usually have something they’re really good at. But it’s usually one thing, and they have to work very hard at it. Often, there are others who are better at it than they are.

Try to limit your hero’s talent to one thing, make him work for the skill, and consider not making him best person in the world at it. Also, offset his talent by showing other areas in which he struggles. For example, he may be good with a sword but can’t shoot a bow to save his life.

3. Destined

In Fantasy, it’s not uncommon for Mary Sues to have some sort of destiny or prophecy to fulfill. They’re often “The Chosen One,” the only one who can stop the villain or save the world.

Solution: This is the hardest issue to fix because it involves changing your plot. See if you can avoid making your hero The Chosen One. Instead, try to find a way to make him commit to defeating the villain, saving the world, etc. without being cornered into it by destiny.

For example, in The Lord of the Rings, Frodo chooses to take the ring to Mordor and destroy it of his own free will. This makes him a much more admirable and brave character than if some curse or prophecy had made him the only one who could destroy it.

4. Without Flaw

Mary Sues have few or no flaws. They can do no wrong, and are often very moral or “goody-goody.”

Solution: Give your characters real flaws. Being ugly or clumsy are not real flaws. This is often one of the hardest parts of creating a hero because we’re afraid of making him unlikable. But strangely enough, a flawed character is actually more likable because he’s more relatable and more interesting. He has layers, different sides to him that contrast and conflict. Need ideas? Check out this list of character flaws.

5. Loved by All

Mary Sue characters are surrounded by people who adore them–except the villain, of course. They might even have several love interests clamoring for their affection. It doesn’t matter what they do or how rude they’ve been, everyone will still love them. The Mary Sue doesn’t even have to give them a reason or earn their trust/friendship/admiration.

Solution: Of course your hero will be loved by friends, family, and maybe a love interest. But not everyone they meet should automatically like them. It’s just not realistic. Give them enemies besides the villain, or have them meet people who just aren’t fond of them. And make sure there’s a reason why people like him–whether it’s friends, a love interest, or strangers.

6. No Struggle

Everything is easy for the Mary Sue character. She doesn’t have to work for anything. Everything she wants falls into her lap, and defeating the villain is a breeze. If she makes a mistake or does something wrong she doesn’t have to face consequences for her actions.

Solution: Don’t make things easy for your hero! Let him struggle, fail, and make mistakes. Don’t give him everything he wants like some spoiled child. Make it difficult for him to defeat the villain so that he “earns” his happy ending.

Have you come across any Mary Sues in books or films? Have you written any yourself? Share your thoughts in the comments below!

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How to Write a Love Triangle Like Jane Austen

~ Kaitlin Hillerich ~ 23 Comments

Jane Austen wrote some of the most romantic stories in literature. But Austen's love triangles don't look like you typical YA love triangles! Here are 4 subtle differences to help you learn how to write a love triangle like Jane Austen!Lately, I’ve been on a Jane Austen movie binge. I just can’t resist the empire gowns, the cravats, the balls, the wit and humor, and Mr. Darcy (insert swoon here).

But in typical writer fashion, of course I couldn’t just enjoy the stories like a normal person–I had to be curious about how Jane Austen constructed them, too. Much like a builder staring up at a domed ceiling and instead of appreciating the beauty thinking, how did they do that?

Yes, I have a problem, but today it’s to your benefit because I’m going to show you how to write a love triangle like Jane Austen 😉

Jane Austen’s design behind her love triangles struck my curiosity because usually I’m not a fan of love triangles. Usually, I find them annoying and predictable. But I was surprised to find that the love triangles in Austen’s works didn’t bother me, and I was able to enjoy them.

Why was that? What had she done differently?

Of course I couldn’t resist analyzing and breaking it down to try to find an answer, and today I’m going to share my findings with you. It turns out, Jane Austen’s love triangles have subtle differences from the typical love triangles I’ve come across in YA novels and even a lot of romance films. Before we break down those differences, let’s take a peek at a typical YA love triangle.

A Look at a “Typical” YA Love Triangle

Most YA love triangles I’ve encountered look something like this:

The heroine falls in love with two guys at the same time. They are both great guys, though usually one is more edgy, distant, aloof, harder to obtain, etc. and/or has a bad boy side.

Guy #2 is usually the more “practical” choice as he’s “safer” and would be “better for her.” He tends to be the boy-next-door or best friend type.

The heroine agonizes over which guy she should choose as both fight for her heart. She goes back and forth between the two and just can’t make up her mind.

Examining Jane Austen’s Love Triangles

Now, on the other hand, let’s examine the elements of the type of love triangle Jane Austen creates.

1. First, the heroine does not fall in love with both men at the same time. She has feelings for only one at a time. In Pride and Prejudice, Elizabeth Bennett has a crush on Wickham for a while. After she learns his true character her feelings subside, and it is only then that her heart begins to turn towards Darcy.

In Sense and Sensibility, Marianne Dashwood ignores the attentions of Colonel Brandon, thinking him too old and unromantic, and falls in love with the dashing Willoughby. But she realizes what Willoughby is really like when he abandons her and breaks her heart. Eventually, Marianne gradually falls in love with Colonel Brandon.

 2. Not both men are good options. In most YA love triangles both love interests are good options, and for the heroine it’s just a matter of deciding who she loves more and wants to spend her life with.

Jane Austen wrote some of the most romantic stories in literature. But Austen's love triangles don't look like you typical YA love triangles! Here are 4 subtle differences to help you learn how to write a love triangle like Jane Austen!But in Jane Austen’s novels, one man is the “right” choice while one man is the “wrong” choice, and it’s up to the heroine to learn their true character in order to make her decision.

Basically, Austen encourages readers not to decide on a man with your heart or romantic feelings, but to judge and know his character.

In many YA love triangles, often the emphasis is placed on feelings and physical attraction and little is revealed about the character of the love interest. But Austen has her heroines learn the character of the love interest so they have a reason to like them that runs deeper than physical attraction.

3. While one man is meant to be the wrong option, both men might appear to be good options. Austen loves to show that charms and dashing good looks do not reveal a man’s true character, and are not enough to build a lasting love.

For example, in Pride and Prejudice Wickham is very charming, good-humored, and handsome. It seems like he’s a decent man and would make a good love interest–until his true character is revealed. Similarly in Sense and Sensibility, Willoughby is dashing, romantic, and charming, but his character is lacking. And in Emma, Frank Churchill is yet another charming man of shallow character.

Austen loves to create characters who appear to be good love interests because they’re handsome, charming, romantic, etc., but in the end it’s the men who possess qualities that matter such as loyalty, commitment, devotion, compassion, honor, responsibility, etc. who end up winning the heroine’s heart.

4. The heroine is decisive and does not waver back and forth between the love interests. The main reason I have such a hard time with modern YA love triangles is that after a while it drives me nuts when the heroine can’t decide between two guys.

I hate the constant jumping back and forth and eventually I want to grab the heroine and shake her and scream just pick one already! I can put up with it for a while, but if it’s dragged out for too long–or over an entire series–it begins to wear on me.

I think authors feel this increases the tension and in a way it does, but it can also make the heroine seem very fickle or as though she is toying with the two guys. Jane Austen avoids this problem by having her heroines feel for only one man at a time, though two men might be interested in the heroine at the same time.

For example, in Pride and Prejudice Mr. Darcy and Wickham are interested in Elizabeth at the same time, but she is only interested in one of them at any given time. And in Sense and Sensibility, both Colonel Brandon and Willoughby are interested in Marianne at the same time, but she only likes one of them at a time.

I find this slight shift in love triangle dynamics interesting, and I can’t help but wonder what these stories would have looked like had the heroines been interested in both men at once!

Jane Austen wrote some of the most romantic stories in literature. But Austen's love triangles don't look like you typical YA love triangles! Here are 4 subtle differences to help you learn how to write a love triangle like Jane Austen!

Final Thoughts

Even though the differences in the way Jane Austen designs her love triangles are subtle, I feel like their impact is much deeper and emotional than that of many modern love triangles out there today.

Austen’s love triangles aren’t about choosing the hottest guy, or the guy who’s the best kisser or the best in bed, or the guy you have the best chemistry with. They’re about choosing the guy with the best character, a man who will truly love and commit to you. They’re about avoiding rogues in gentleman’s clothing, or villains with the face of a Disney prince.

Personally, I find this type of love triangle more realistic and relatable. The romance it creates also provides more depth because we get to truly know the characters–not just read lengthy descriptions of heated make-out scenes.

Which type of love triangle do you prefer? Are there any other differences between typical YA love triangles and Jane Austen’s that I missed? What do you think Jane Austen’s stories would have been like if they were done in the style of a typical YA love triangle? Leave you thoughts below!

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Writing 101: Creating a Successful Hero and Villain

~ Kaitlin Hillerich ~ 5 Comments

Part 3 in the Writing 101 series for beginning writers. Learn the roles your hero and villain play in your story, and the elements you need in each one to create successful characters! Welcome to Part 3 of the Writing 101 series for beginning writers! Are you a bit behind? You can catch Part 1 (The Fundamentals of Story) here, and Part 2 (Writing Term Glossary) here.

Today, we’re talking characters. In order to craft a successful, compelling story, you need to understand a) the roles your hero and villain play, and b) what you need to make them work. Let’s get started, shall we?

The Protagonist’s Role

In Part 1 of this series, we said that a story is:

About someone (hero) who wants something (goal), sets out on a journey to attain it (plot), and grows or learns something along the way (change).

Reading a story is about sharing an experience, so you have to decide whose story it is and whose experience we’ll be sharing. Your hero is the character whom your story centers around. He or she offers your readers a point of access to your story by allowing them to  experience events from his/her point of view rather than as a neutral outsider. The hero invites us in and lets us become a part of the story.

Think of your story as the track of a roller coaster–it has ups and downs, twists and turns, and maybe a couple stomach-dropping loops. Your hero is the car of the roller coaster the reader enters to experience the thrills you’ve created. If you don’t let your readers get up close and personal with the hero, then they’ll just be someone standing in line watching the roller coaster go by from a distance but not getting to experience it for themselves.

There are 4 main “ingredients” you need to successfully create a hero: goal, likability, realism, and change.

1. Goal

Your hero’s goal is what drives your story. What does he want? What is he trying to achieve? How your hero sets out to get what he wants becomes your plot. If your hero doesn’t have a goal, your story has no direction. Actually, without a goal you don’t have a story at all. A goal unifies your story’s events and gives them purpose. And if you don’t know what your hero is trying to achieve, you won’t be able to create compelling conflict that stands in his way.

2. Likability

One of the most important parts of creating your hero is to make readers care about him. We don’t stick through a 200+ page story to read about a character we hate! It doesn’t matter how awesome your plot is, if we don’t like your hero we won’t care about whether or not he achieves his goal. And that means game over for your novel.

3. Realism

In order for your hero to feel like a real person, you need to give him flaws, strengths, a personality, a past, etc. The biggest mistake beginning writers make is creating a hero who is too perfect or too strong. Your hero needs flaws and weaknesses to seem human. If he’s handsome, perfect, super smart, and can kick ass like a freaking ninja, your readers won’t be able to identify with him. We relate to flawed characters far more than we relate to perfect characters. And flawed characters are always far more interesting.

4. Change

Most new writers get so wrapped up focusing on getting their hero through the external plot that they tend to forget about the internal. But change is an important part of a satisfying story. Your hero should be different in some way at the end of the novel versus how he was at the beginning. If he was rich, prejudiced, or cowardly on page one and he’s still rich, prejudiced, or cowardly when we read The End, there’s a problem. When people go through big experiences in real life, it changes them. You need to reflect this in your novel.

The Antagonist’s Role

The main role of your story’s villain is to provide your story with conflict. Whatever it is your hero wants, the villain is standing in the way. Actually, your villain wants the opposite of what the hero wants. Both forces are trying their hardest to achieve their goals, which causes them to clash.

The hero wants to save the city. The villain wants to destroy it. The hero wants to destroy the object of the villain’s power. The villain wants to save it. The hero wants to overthrow the villain’s rule. The villain wants to squash the hero’s rebellion.

Your story is about the conflict between the hero and the villain. Your plot shows us how the hero tries to achieve his goal, how the villain tries to stop him, and who wins out in the end.

Similar to creating a hero, there are 4 main “ingredients” you need to create a successful villain: Goal, Loathing, Realism, and Credibility.

1.Goal

Just as with your hero, your villain needs a goal. You need to figure out what he wants and why. He can’t be trying to take over the world or destroy New York City “just because he’s evil.” He needs an actual reason that justifies him going through all the trouble. His goal should oppose your hero’s to create conflict.

2. Loathing

While with your hero you need to create likability, with your villain your aim is to do the opposite. You need readers to hate and fear your villain to get them on that emotional roller coaster, and so it will be satisfying when the hero finally defeats him. But don’t just tell us that he’s evil–show us through his words and actions.

3. Realism

In order for readers to fear your villain, he needs to feel like a real person. That mean giving him strengths, flaws, a past, etc. just like you would with your hero. The biggest mistake new writers make with their villains is making them too evil. In real life, people aren’t so black and white. You want to make your villain (and hero) more grey by giving them a mix of both good and bad qualities.

4. Credibility

Your villain in the main source of conflict in your novel, and therefore  also a huge source of tension. You want to keep readers wondering if the hero will win–if things seem too easy the reader will feel they know the answer, so they’ll stop turning pages. This means you need to create a strong villain who backs up his threats so readers will know he means business. And most importantly, you need to let your hero lose some battles to keep readers anxious!

Need more help with villains? I know they’re the most difficult character to write, so I’ve created a free e-book to help you out–just click here to download the PDF!

Ready for Part 4 (Unraveling Tension, Conflict, and Your Plot)? Click here!

What elements do you think go into creating a successful hero and villain?

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Creating Emotional Connections: The Psychology of Emotional Stories (A Guest Post by Faye Kirwin of Writerology)

~ Kaitlin Hillerich ~ 2 Comments

Learn how to use techniques from psychology to create an emotional bond between your readers and characters. This is a guest post from the lovely Faye Kirwin of Writerology.

Writing is all about people—the characters, the readers, the author, all drawn together by emotion. If you can tie your readers’ emotions to your characters, they’re tied to the story, and it’s that connection that will stay with them long after they’ve finished reading.

But… that’s easier said than done, right? A lot of mystery and uncertainty surrounds those emotional bonds with the reader. Is it something that just happens naturally? Is there a trick to it? How come it works with some characters and not others? How do you create an emotional connection anyway? Psychology offers a solution: peek inside the brain. If you can find out what happens to someone when they’re caught up in a story, the mystery surrounding emotional connection begins to clear.

Professor Paul Zak set about doing just that. He had a group of participants watch a video that told the highly emotional story of a father struggling with the fact that his two-year-old son had only a few months left to live. After the video, Professor Zak found an increase in two neurochemicals produced by participants’ brains: cortisol and oxytocin.

Cortisol, a chemical involved in focusing attention on things that are important, was related to how distressed participants felt. The more distressed they felt, the more cortisol they produced, and the more attention they paid to the video. Oxytocin, a chemical involved in social bonding, was related to how much empathy the participants experienced. The more oxytocin they produced, the more empathetic they felt. If you put these two neurochemicals together, you have the ingredients for an emotional connection—but knowing what happens to make your reader emotionally involved isn’t the end of the story. Now you need to know how to create those circumstances yourself.

Step 1: Capture Your Readers’ Attention

Transportation, that magical moment when readers experience the characters’ emotions for themselves, can only happen if the story holds their attention. How can you ensure you do that? Keep raising the tension. Don’t go easy on your characters. Tension and conflict ramp up distress, which is linked to cortisol, one of the ingredients for emotional connection.

Professor Zak recommends using Freytag’s dramatic arc to pile on the tension and maintain the readers’ interest throughout the story. Let’s take a brief look at it now.

Freytag's Pyramid - Creating Emotional Connections

The dramatic arc is a type of story structure made up of five acts: exposition, rising action, climax, falling action and dénouement. Tension increases throughout the rising action act, culminating in the conflict-laden climax of the story, and it’s this elicitation of distress that captures your readers’ attention and prepares them for the next step: empathising with the characters.

Step 2: Elicit Your Readers’ Empathy

Maintaining readers’ interest doesn’t guarantee that they’ll develop an emotional connection with the characters. How many books have you read that had an exciting, relentless, page-turning plot but neglected to develop their cast? With the focus on the external events that happen to the characters, plot-driven stories capture the readers’ attention, but don’t necessarily establish bonds that stick around after reaching ‘The End’. Characters do that, which is why Professor Zak points to character-driven stories as the best way to create emotional connections with readers.

What elements of a character-driven story make it so easy to form a bond?

  1. Memorable characters. Readers don’t care for the shallow, cardboard cut-outs they’ve seen a hundred times before. They want characters who are quirky, flawed, relatable, varied and complex, characters who make a home in their memories and refuse to move out. Your job as a writer is to create characters like these. I recommend a helping of psychology to keep your cast unique and, above all, realistic.
  2. Steady character development. The plot doesn’t just transport characters physically but emotionally too. What happens to them over the course of the story will change them for better or worse, and it’s this development that will engage your readers and spur them on to emotionally invest in your characters. K. M. Weiland has a fantastic and in-depth series on character arc that can help you to do just that.
  3. Engaging and relatable internal conflict. Tension doesn’t just come from external conflict; it comes from the internal variety as well. Having your characters struggle with their self-doubt, weaknesses and inner demons makes them relatable, understandable and ultimately someone readers can empathise with.

Step 3: Combine Attention and Empathy to Create a Connection

Readers form emotional bonds with the characters and the story when you maintain their attention and elicit their empathy. Increase tension throughout the story with exciting external conflicts and draw out empathy with memorable characters, steady development and engaging internal conflict. Do that and you have the ingredients you need to create an emotional connection that will stay with your readers long after they’ve put the book down.

About the Author

Faye Kirwin - WriterologyFaye Kirwin is a writer with a passion for words, minds and tea. She blogs over at Writerology, where she applies the science of psychology to the art of storytelling and teaches authors how to make writing a part of their everyday lives.

When she’s not blogging or running the Writember Workshop, she writes fiction chock-full of magic, clockwork and tea. (Mm, tea.)

10 Signs Your Villain Might be Cheesy

~ Kaitlin Hillerich ~ 11 Comments

No one likes a cheesy, boring villain! Here are 10 cliches to avoid so you can write a villain readers will fear instead of laugh at.

I’m not going to lie–good villains are damn hard to write. But they’re one of the most important characters in your story (arguably, the most important!), so you need to spend the time getting him right.

As a reader, you’ve probably noticed an abundance of villain cliches in books, but sometimes it’s hard to see these in your own villain. Or, maybe you’re not sure what it is exactly that makes a villain cheesy or cliched. Maybe you’re afraid you have a cheesy villain without even realizing it.

Don’t fret! With a little work (okay, maybe a lot of work), a cheesy villain can be polished into one who’s formidable. Let’s get started, shall we?

1.Theatrical Outfits

The cheesy villain dresses like he’s part of a Broadway show, or a teen going through a Goth phase. His outfits must scream ‘I’m evil.’ His wardrobe consists of black, red, leather, spikes and studs, long capes or coats, and anything printed with skulls. He wants to make sure you know he’s evil, just in case, you know, you couldn’t tell from his smoldering scowl. Bonus points if he’s ugly or disfigured, adding to his edgy appearance.

2. Stage Name

If your villain insists on dressing like a pop star, he’ll probably choose a flamboyant name that will make Lady Gaga jealous. You know, something stylishly evil like Crimson Bane or Lord Dark Skull or Damon Shadow-blood. Wait, are we naming a villain or a bad punk band?

3. Over dramatic

Like a teenager begging for attention, the cheesy villain goes out of his way to make sure you know he’s evil. He razes villages and slaughters innocents for no reason other than to prove that he really really is evil. And you should like, be totally terrified. He’s constantly snarling threats and insults, and doesn’t hesitate to torture or kill random henchman. Are you paying attention yet? No? Maybe some maniacal laughter will make you show him the respect he clearly deserves.

4. Bargain Bin Henchmen

Speaking of ill-fated henchmen, the cheesy villain always seems to employ an abundance of useless minions. They have worse aim than a firing squad of Stormtroopers and are always letting the heroes escape. You would think that someone as powerful and cunning as a villain would find a way to get the best of the best fighting for him. But apparently undying, mindless loyalty is better than competence. And taking over the world these days is expensive, you gotta cut costs somewhere.

5. Gossip Girl

Like a gossipy teen girl, the cheesy villain loves to chat. Especially about his plans. Once he’s captured the hero, he finds it necessary to explain every detail of his master scheme. He can’t help but reveal how he was behind everything, how he managed to trap the hero, and what he plans to do next. He has to brag to the hero about how brilliant and diabolical he is. Because if he doesn’t, then how will the hero appreciate his evilness? While he’s busy chatting away and taunting the hero about how he’s going to kill him, the hero will make his escape.

6. False Swagger

Cheesy villains have a certain swagger about them. They always smirk, sneer, glower, and glare. They have dark smiles and chilling laughs. They boast about how clever they are, and have an arsenal of witty and nasty insults. When they’re not making empty threats, they’re probably plucking the wings off butterflies. But really, this sort of villain is nothing more than a poser–he’s all talk and no game. He may constantly taunt the hero about how he’s going to kill him and destroy everything he loves, but it will never come to pass.

7. Awkward Dialogue

Villains tend to get the worst dialogue. If they’re not shooting off wise cracks, puns, and witty remarks like a comic book super villain, they have an aversion to contractions and speak with an eloquent malice like they’re in a High Fantasy novel…even if the story is set in 21st century New York. They often speak very on-the-nose, saying exactly what they’re thinking and being completely transparent–which most people don’t do, whether they’re evil or good. And of course, they talk way too much.

They also tend to say phrases we’ve heard a hundred times like:

  • You think you can defeat me?
  • You have no idea how long I have planned this moment.
  • Well, well, well.
  • I will take great pleasure in killing you.
  • You will never escape/defeat me/see your lover again.
  • Bonus: addresses the hero as boy/girl instead of using their name.

Cut down on your villain’s witty remarks and taunts, and give him dialogue that is time-period appropriate. And if you feel like you’ve heard a line before, change or cut it!

8. Black and White

One of the main problems with the cheesy villain is that more often than not his character is underdeveloped and flat. He is defined only by his evilness with no grey areas. He only feels anger and hatred and is evil for the sake of being evil. But villains need goals, motives, pasts, and personalities just like heroes. Don’t forget that villains are people too!

9. Overcompensating

The cheesy villain has to try so hard to act and look evil because in reality, he sucks. The hero always gets away unscathed, his plans always fail, his traps never work, his threats never come true. The more he fails, the more anxious he becomes that the hero might not take him seriously, so the harder he tries to prove his evilness. Maybe he shouldn’t have skived off so many Evil 101 classes at the Villain Academy….

10. Cat with a Mouse

If there’s one thing the cheesy villain can’t resist, it’s concocting ridiculous ways for the hero to die. Instead of killing him at once and taking care of the problem, the cheesy villain likes to play with his victim like a cat with a mouse. Why run the hero through with a sword or place a well-aimed bullet in his head? Screw efficiency. This is the moment for the villain to show his twisted creativity.

But once the villain sets up his elaborate death trap, he will scurry off to finish his evil plans, giving the hero an opportunity to escape. Stick around and make sure your most hated enemy dies a gruesome death? Ain’t nobody got time for that. The world won’t take over itself, you know.

When done well, your villain can be one of the most interesting characters in your story. What do you look for in a good villain? Share your thoughts below!

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The Do’s and Don’ts of Character Bios

~ Kaitlin Hillerich ~ 7 Comments

The Do's and Don'ts of Character Bios | Learn how to #write a solid #character bio without going overboard on unnecessary details. Plus, a FREE worksheet!I love getting to know my characters–it’s one of my favorite parts of writing a story. But it wasn’t always that way! When I first started writing, I stressed out so much over creating life-like characters. Just how much did I need to know about them? I thought that in order to make my characters realistic I needed to know everything about them. And I mean everything.

Have you ever seen those lengthy character questionnaires with endless questions like “what’s his favorite color?” or “what’s in her purse right now?” or even “what color underwear does he wear? Boxers or briefs?”

I’m not making this stuff up, people. (Okay, well maybe I am a little). But seriously, I hate all those lists of silly questions. They’re such a waste of time! And I used to think that I needed to answer them all in order to get to know my character. Oh, naivety.

Some of those questions may be interesting and give you insight into your character, but let’s be real here, how much of that information are you actually going to use? And more importantly, how much should you use? You may not realize it, but having too much information about your character can do more harm than good!

The Cons of Questionnaires

How so? Because you when you fill out those sorts of bio questionnaires, you end up with loads of unnecessary information. Which does not bode well for your novel. When you create a character bio, you only want information that is relevant to your story–everything else needs to go.

If you have all of these extra details you find interesting but have nothing whatsoever to do with your story, you’re going to be tempted to find ways to try to cram them in. You might add in random scenes or subplots to show this information, but you will only succeed in confusing the reader. They’ll wonder where you’re going with that, and how it’s important to the story.

The answers is nowhere and not at all. But see, that’s how a reader’s mind works–they trust that everything you’re telling them is relevant in some way to the story, and if it is not important now it will be of importance later. If the reader turns the last page and realizes that one scene where Ben showed off his martial arts skills actually wasn’t of any importance of all, they’re going to feel cheated and lose trust in you.

The Secret to a Focused Bio

So how do you create a character bio that works without going overboard (thus saving you time and headaches)? You need to focus on two main points: the origin of your character’s internal issue, and his goal/motivation.

“That’s it?!” you asked, bewildered.

Can it really be that simple? Yes, yes it can. Okay, so yes, you’re going to explore other things like flaws, strengths, personality traits, etc. but these two points are the guiding lights that are basically the basis for your whole story.

Let’s look at an example.

In Frozen, we see how Elsa’s parents feared her powers and taught her that she should hide them and pretend like they weren’t there. This childhood experience is what creates her internal conflict: her struggle with controlling her powers and her shame of being different. Her goal in the story is to let go of everything she’s tried to suppress and finally embrace herself and her powers. These two things are not only the basis for Elsa’s character, but also the plot of the story!

So what are some do’s and dont’s for creating a solid character bio that doesn’t go overboard?

The Do’s

1. Focus on your character’s arc. Your story is essentially about how your character changes as he tries to achieve his goal. Your character bio should focus on what your character was like before the change that will take place in the story. This usually revolves around the internal conflict. For example, is he prejudiced now but will become accepting by the end of the story? Dig around and found out why or where this started.

2. Give every major character a bio. Yes it’s a lot of work, but it’s important work. You need to understand what makes all of your characters tick, what they want, and what’s motivating them. Of course you won’t need to go as in-depth for minor characters as opposed to main characters, and not everything will make it onto the page, but you need to know it in order to make them realistic.

The Don’ts

1. Don’t hold back. Don’t shy away from getting into the psychology of your character. Explore their past and unearth their secrets, sins, and skeletons. What are they hiding that they don’t want to tell you? Dig deep and make them talk.

2. Don’t try to write your bio like it’s your novel. Forget perfection. No one is going to see this except you, so who cares if it’s a hot mess? Scribble, use brief notes only you can decipher, jump around all over your character’s timeline. Anything goes.

What’s your opinion on character questionnaires? What methods do you use for creating your character bios?

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Does Your Hero Have an Opinion?

~ Kaitlin Hillerich

Does Your #Hero Have an Opinion? | Your hero's opinions are an important part of his #characterization. Learn what sort of opinions to share and how to show them! “So what did you think?”

We love asking this question to friends, family, and even new acquaintances. Whether it’s about a movie, TV show, book, restaurant, place, concert, or event, we enjoying hearing people’s answer. But why?

We want to know how they experienced it. We want to know their opinion.

Again, why?

Because sharing our experiences brings us closer together, and our opinions reveal more about who we are and our perspective on the world. Everyone experiences things differently, and everyone has a different opinion. It’s in our nature to be curious about what others are thinking and how they see things.

Think about it. Why do we go to the movies with friends? Isn’t it kind of silly? You’re sitting in a dark theater where you can’t talk to each other, so why not just go alone? Because we enjoy having another person there to share the experience of the story.

But perhaps more importantly, after the final credits have rolled we can’t wait to swap our opinions about what we’ve just seen. What did you think of the actor? The special effects? The storyline? We love knowing people’s opinions!

So let me ask you: what are your hero’s opinions? Do you reveal them throughout the story? If not, you should! Let’s examine the why, what, and how of showing your hero’s opinion.

Why Show Your Hero’s Opinion?

Showing your hero’s opinion is an excellent way to develop his character. This will add another layer of depth that will make him even more realistic.  It also helps your readers get to know who he is and starts to create a bond. His opinions will not only reveal how he sees the world, but will also shape the tone and personality of the writing.

What Opinions Should You Show?

Here’s the crucial bit: only show us your hero’s opinions on things that are relevant to the story!

If government plays an important role, show us his opinion on the government. If his teacher plays a role in a scene, show us his opinion of her. But don’t give us his opinion on things like bubblegum and kittens that have nothing to do with who he is or what’s happening in the story!

Be sure to give us his opinion about any new experiences, events, people, places, etc. he comes into contact with during the story. You’d be surprised how many writers forget to do this!

For example, let’s say the hero finds himself in a top-secret government department that covers up the existence of aliens. He acts surprised for a moment, but then keeps charging headlong through the action of the plot. Wait. Pause. I want to know what the heck the hero is thinking about all this! What is his opinion? Get into the habit of showing your hero’s internal as well as external reactions!

Ultimately, what opinions are and aren’t important is for you to decide. Just remember to keep it relevant!

How Do You Show Your Hero’s Opinion?

If you’re writing in first person this one is easy–you just say what the hero is thinking. But if you’re writing in third person it’s a little trickier.

When you’re writing in third person, try to remember to filter everything through the hero’s point of view. This means the words, similes etc. that you use to describe what your hero is seeing and experiencing should be ones that he would choose himself. Word choice is a more subtle expression of opinion–it lets you know how the character feels about something without actually coming right out and saying it.

You’re also going to want to share what your character’s opinion through their thoughts. Italics work and is what many writers use, but I’m not a fan of them. I think they show the author’s hand in the story and create distance between the reader and character. I prefer weaving the hero’s thoughts right into the narrative. I’ve written an in-depth post on how to do this, which you can read here.

Showing your hero’s opinion is all about looking inward and remembering to balance the external and internal. However, it’s important to keep in mind that your hero’s opinion is more than an emotional reaction–his belief itself will shape his reaction.

Best of luck with your character crafting!

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